It is important to Understand the unexplained behaviors of Abandonment because it is the first step to self awareness.
Let’s focus on You and the behaviors you can’t control.
The need to people please even if it is not in your best interest, the fear of being abandoned and the constant pattern of engaging into and maintaining unhealthy relationships. Life gets too difficult because you feel unworthy of love. You are constantly avoiding emotional intimacy because of insecurity and self-doubt. But the fear of making a change is too overwhelming. At the end of the day you are longing for purpose and fulfillment, which seem impossible to attain. All it takes is hope and curiosity to start understanding and appreciating your own strengths and weaknesses. A healthier and happier life is possible.
People Pleasing.
The need to people please even if it is not in your best interest. Often telling yourself that as long as you meet their needs they will not leave you. The behavior to people please is beyond your control and the closest learn’t ability to create and to try and maintain relationships. The reality is something completely different that does not allow you to see the toxic behavior and that often causes you to engage with people that do not appreciate you.
Constantly avoiding emotional intimacy.
It’s hard to start relationships because of the inability to connect. It is often easier to not engage and to keep moving without the attempt to understand why it is so difficult to try. Understanding the behaviors that you have in regards to emotional intimacy will help discover what changes need to be made to stop avoiding possible relationships.
Codependency/ Constant pattern of engaging into and maintaining unhealthy relationships.
Unable to express your emotions and needs, difficulty identifying your own feelings and needs. Your relationships are one sided and emotionally destructive or abusive. Yet, the fear to be alone is stronger than the toxic relationships that are always present. This seems to be so normal, making it that much harder to ever think that better or healthier is a possibility.
Feel Unworthy of Love, Insecurity and low Self-esteem.
No one will love me because I don’t love myself. How can someone love me if I can’t do anything right? When your self-esteem is low it is often difficult to see the value in yourself. You truly believe that you are not worth anything and you convince yourself that no one will see any worth because there isn’t any. You have the power to learn how to love yourself again and to know your worth.
“Codependency is using a relationship to fill a bottomless void due to not feeling whole and loved as an individual.
It’s not the need to be loved that’s the issue, it’s the inability to love one’s self that causes the dysfunction.”
-Graham R White
